Giles na Magaleen

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Curriculum Vitae – Lord Giles na Magaleen

Name: Lord Giles na Magaleen, Ninth Earl of Clangiles, Twelfth Baron Magleenstown
Address: Cashelmagaleen House,Sleevecaccbow,  Ballymagaleen Peninsula, Hibernian Littoral
Email: giles@ballymagaleen.com (mail frequently misdirected to the wine cellar)

B.A. (Hons) in Comparative Philology & Obscure Languages
University of Dublin & Peripatetic Colleges of Europe, 1987

• Thesis: “Pre-Postmodern Hiberno-Indic Verb Systems in the Poetry of the Moderately Sober”
   
• Joint tutorials in Old Irish, Latin, Proto-Indo-European, and Pub Conversation Studies.
   

M.Phil. in Applied Linguistics, Banking & Ritual
Muldoon Institute of Shrinking Numbers, Queens’ College, Kildare, 1993

• Dissertation on the language games of offshore prospecti.
   
• Fieldwork in private banks, wine auctions, and monastic archives.
   

Dr.Phil. (unsubmitted but frequently cited)
Pontifical Gaelic Academy / University of Tübingen-by-the-Sea

• Research topic: “From Usury to Eucharist: The Semiotics of Interest”.
   
• Thesis lodged in a safety deposit box for security reasons.
   

Diploma in International Asset Displacement & Trust Structures
Isle of Man Centre for Applied Discretion, 2001

• Special focus on caves, Templars, and non-resident beneficial ownership.
   

Independent Scholar, Philologist & Financial Flâneur
Self-employed, Ballymagaleen & Various Jurisdictions, 1987–present

• Conducts original research into language, liturgy, and ledger-books
• Advises discreet clients on the proper pronunciation of Latin mottos on share certificates.
• Occasional lecturer on “The Poetry of Double-Entry Bookkeeping”.
   

Consultant (Cultural & Financial) – Unnamed Government Department
London / Vienna / Assorted Railway Compartments, 1989–1998

• Seconded from an organisation colloquially known as “The Panto”.
  
• Responsibilities included:
   
  • Evaluating the security of Central European wine cellars.
     
  • Monitoring the semantic drift of words like “offshore”, “charitable”, and “plausible”.
     
  • Ensuring that sensitive conversations were held only in extremely noisy cafés.
     

Visiting Fellow in Oenology & Monetary Theology
St Pierian’s Well & Attached Research Institute, Ballymagaleen, 2005–present

• Comparative study of sacramental wine, Tokay, and quantitative easing.
   
• Supervises experiments in adding holy well water to whiskey for epistemological clarity.
   

Director (Honorary & Occasionally Alarmed)
Assorted trusts and vehicles linked to Paddy2021 LLC

• Oversight of classic-car exports, import-export of ideas, and fiscal escapology.
   
• Negotiates between accountants, vintners and mechanics, usually in Latin.
   

• “Towards a Grammar of Offshore Banking” – circulated privately in brown envelopes.
   
• “The Semiotics of the Wine List: Notes from the Cellar” – in Transactions of the Ballymagaleen Philosophical Society.
   
• “On the Metaphysics of Overdraft” – keynote lecture, Dooley’s Snug, after hours.
   

• Irish (native, with dialectical embellishments)
   
• English (Hiberno, Received, and Public School Under-Duress)
   
• Latin and Church Latin (with correct vowel quantity after second glass of claret)
   
• German, French, and serviceable Hungarian
   
• Reading knowledge of Occitan, Basque, and Banking Swiss.
   

• Historical and modern banking; trust law as a branch of speculative theology.
   
• Wine (especially Tokay), fortified wines, and anything still drinkable from the Habsburg era.
   
• Classic cars, especially those that depreciate slowly and appreciate in anecdote.
   
• Monastic scriptoria, marginalia, and the footnotes of history.
   
• The imaginative reconstruction of aristocracy as a community service.
   

Referees may be obtained, under seal, from:

• The Reverend Dr Christopher Hitchens, sometime spiritual adviser.
   
• Dr K. P. Nutterlee, psychiatrist and reluctant character witness.
   
• Toby Festetics, late of “The Panto”, presently “somewhere on the continent”.